Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
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