Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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