i may or may not be watching the land before time
He kissed a someone with a penis
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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