the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
