at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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