I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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