it was like his penis was on wheels.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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