i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
