He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
