Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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