just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
