dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
