Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
