Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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