its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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