I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
