Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
