Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i will never coherently bang her
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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