I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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