I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
look no pants
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
