I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
