She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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