im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
he puts the penis in happiness.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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