is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
