i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Randomize
