garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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