If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
