I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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