you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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