You're completely useless in the revolution.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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