the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Enjoy the penises
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
