we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
