What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
