How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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