Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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