I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
