We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
