If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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