I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
