I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
