Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
