i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
