That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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