Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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