Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
