she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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