Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize