i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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