i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
