How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize