My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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