Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
